Blimey, what’s your gob got planned today, a bloody WikiLeaks audition? Keep that trap of yours on a bally leash, mate. You’re so open, they could use you as a bus stop. But don’t go blabbing your Auntie Mabel’s secret jam recipe, or your best mate’s taste for rubber ducks in the bath. Discretion, old chum, is the better part of not getting a welly in the ‘nads! Your lucky phrase today is “Loose lips sink ships.” Say it to yourself every time you’re about to spill the beans. A bit clich�, you say? Well, so’s your face, but we’re not moaning about it, are we?

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!