Blimey, it’s all kicking off for you, innit? You’re about to get an offer that’s more tempting than a free bar at a Wetherspoons. You’re going to get paid for putting your noggin to work – it’s about as refreshing as a G&T after a sweaty tube ride. The pay might be more disappointing than a soggy scone, but don’t get your knickers in a twist. What you’re learning here is worth more than any dodgy contract gig, and it’ll make you hotter property than a Kensington townhouse. And for your lucky little extra, your lucky colour is puce. Yes, puce. It’s like someone mixed the colours of a hangover and a regrettable one-night stand, but apparently, it’s going to bring you luck. Who knew?

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!