Well, love, you’ve absolutely copped it, haven’t you? You’ve reached the end of your rope, as far as this one particular thing goes. Don’t get your knickers in a twist though, because shaking things up a bit might be just the ticket. It’s a better shout than sitting on your arse doing naff all, innit? And as for that worrywart of a relative who reckons you should stick with the status quo – tell ’em to do one! You’re not some sort of wet blanket, are you? And here’s a right laugh for you – your lucky charm is a baked bean. Yes, a single sodding baked bean. I don’t make the rules, darling. Apparently, it’s meant to bring you a bit of the old good fortune. Might want to keep it in a bag though, lest you inadvertently squish it in your pocket, eh?

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!