Well, you’ve got an imagination that’s brighter than a bishop’s robe at a disco. Your charm’s pulling in all the right cronies, like bees to honey or MPs to a scandal. At work or down the local, you’re winning over the big cheeses – you could probably sell ice to an Eskimo or a diet plan to a sumo wrestler. And flattery, dear heart, is your secret weapon. Don’t be shy to butter them up; a few sweet nothings could win you the golden ticket. You could make a hyena blush with your compliments, so go on and dish them out like a drunk granny at a wedding. And here’s your lucky touch for the day, love. Your lucky colour is “shocking pink” – it’s as subtle as a sledgehammer, just like you. Wear it with pride, but don’t blame me if you get mistaken for a flamingo.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!