In a style as British as a soggy scone, we offer this cheeky ‘scope, mate. Keep your pecker up and watch how all the blindin’ opportunities come flocking like pigeons to breadcrumbs. Your artistic endeavours are booming, especially when you’re chinwagging with your equally loony mates. Your sixth sense and imagination are on bloody steroids! And the best bit? You’ll see your wallet fattening up just by exploiting those natural talents of yours – and we’re not talking about your ability to down a pint in 3 seconds flat. Your lucky phrase this week? “It’s not a beer belly, it’s a fuel tank for a love machine.” So, pop on some shocking pink – it’s your lucky colour, you flamboyant peacock. Not only will you light up the room, you’ll also double up as a decent traffic cone.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!