Oi, listen up, you’ve got a right maelstrom in your love life that needs some proper brain tickling. Your other half’s been mainlining espresso or something, bouncing off the bloody walls. You’ll have to match their bonkers energy, but lucky for you, your sense of fun is as infectious as a winter cold. With a bit of imagination, you’ll keep things as positive as a self-help book on steroids. Now, as for your special lucky charm, it’s a rubber chicken. Don’t ask why, the stars are a bit mental sometimes. Just remember, next time you’re in a tight spot, whip out that chicken and give it a squeeze. It’s either going to solve all your problems or get you some very strange looks on the tube. Either way, it’s a win.

Come back tomorrow for another exciting horoscope!